hands

between
my thumb and
index
fingers
I hold
yours

some
new scars
since
the last time

but still
mostly
the same

familiar
and beautiful
I kiss
them
they
express

love

shovelling

across
the concrete
scraping

steel blade
pushes
frozen
dust of
water vapor

crystal
flakes
blowing
out of the north

bundled
aching
three more
inches

steam
expelled
from lips
nose
drips

shovel
the
drive

flight in the air

a harp
plucked
ethereal
and
I'm the
one
played

too loud

too big
too bold
too much
too many

that's me

I finally know
but it's
too late

depression

i used to
try to save
every single
morsel

i was afraid
of losing
it all
if i lost
the tiniest
crumb

just like
my mother
saved her
straws and napkins
from the
restaurant
because
she learned
in the depression
how hard things
could be
to come by

i used
to gather up
the remnants
and reminisce
somehow knowing
how
difficult
it would be
to come by
happiness again
some day

but i forgot
to gather
up the present

absent
losing it all
while trying to
gather up
and save

a little jazz

from far away
a horn
is flowing
toward my
senses

a little bass
places
the rhythm
in my foot

and the brushes
kiss the snare

just about there

my nostrils flare
and I take a sniff
of blackness
warm in cup

between my years
they coalesce
and I emerge
in tune

broken lady

hi my name is
broken lady

bent
and
crumpled
rumpled
up
with life

dropped
from
high
altitudes

exploding
across
the pavement
in every
direction
from
the point
of impact

betrayed
by time
and illusions
delusions
and
false
conclusions

beaten
by the
bricks
of each
and every
bad
decision

happy
to make
your acquaintance
but
please
don't shake
my hand

don't touch
me
don't
come near
me
I am broken
and you
might
get cut

cover

i want to knit
you a blanket
of the warmest
fiber
hand spun
on my very own
loom
harvested
from my
hemp
and my
flax
and my
sheep

i want
to dye
the fiber
the richest
colors
from the
ripest
fruit
and the
driest
root

i want
to tie
each knot
and seal
it with a tear
to keep you
dry
and safe
from fear

i want
to take
that blanket
and wrap
you up
keep you warm
safe from harm

i want to
knit you a blanket
adorned
with
a landscape
of love
fertile earth below
shining heavens above

i want to
cover every inch
i want to
cover every thing
i want to
keep you warm
keep you
safe from harm

image

there it was
a 4 x 5
with all the
reds faded
you smiling
on the beach
your eyes
laughing
a future
was
dancing
in the wings
but never
took the
stage
because
of rage
we never
turned the
page

like misery

stone
inside
heart

weight
transfered
pride

a kiss
a wish
a feather

we could be
together

but we
like misery

too late?

is it too late
to love you?

am I too far gone?

is it too late
to love you?

have you moved on?

every tree speaks your name
with the rustling of the leaves
the wind is its breath

every tall grass prairie
waves me on toward you
blazing gold
in autumnal splendor
it is you I remember

I'm blanketed in compost
warm and steaming in the frost
of late fall, winter coming

you're far gone
but the guitar imitates
your timber and your pitch

I turn away
only to see the ocean
and the waves
of the tides pull
the memories
of warm nights
and the churning

quell this yearning
have mercy

what is contentment?
leave me in peace.
stop the ghosts from beckoning

let the waves wash over
these memories
and erase them
from my shores

a blank and peaceful
beach
I can rest upon
once more

murder in Gaza

a body
lies in Gaza
dead
and dreaming
not much
different
than the
living

stone

hard
around
the
edges

rolling
and
pushed
by time

resting
against
a multitude

begun
until
again

kicked
blown
polished
by the wind

broken no more

in so deep
it hurts

it's going
to be
a long time
coming

until
we can
walk again
in daylight

I can't wait
to hold
your
hands
and show
my friends
my
beloved

will we be
too old
by then?

no
no
we
can't

I'll
stay timeless
in my
cocoon
with
you

wrapped
in
warmth
and
smiles

effortless
broken
no more

lay down

past
the pause
that interrupts
a fragile
balance
of tangling

beside
the stream
inside
a dream
we recline
together

your breath
brushes
my cheek
your touch
whispers
of love

I am bent
down
with
emotion
my eyes
shut

I shutter
you are
there
and have
the essence
I need
to survive

I writhe
with desire
and ache
against
the hope
of our bed
becoming
a garden
where
love
can grow

somehow entrenched

give the universe the finger
that's right
point it right at the heart of god

nothing works out
it all falls apart
you and I are not different
from chaos
itself

between us
individuality blurs
we become
each others pain

push and pull
refrain

every kiss
every soft touch
is a rush of joy
but a fearful
cut widens

with the depth
of feeling
that fear grows
and grows

and I just want to settle!
I just want to settle!
but I can settle
for no one but you.

how hard
it is to feel you
from way over here
way over
here

compassion

dew bejeweled grass
amber sunset tinted blades
sharper beams refracted

a breath of shade
relief from burning rays
and sizzling pavement

nest of a warm blanket
insulating the chill
comfort and cradle

pushing the edge

knife to skin

push edge through

red pours life

essence streams

cold fingertips touch
across the abyss

smell
the acrid acid
of hell

states of matter

a solid
it happens
my
heart
beats

a liquid
my blood
pulses
and
I feel

gaseous
buoyant
recumbent

I turn
to plasma
and suffer
you

you exist

most definitely
you exist

and there
the molecules
resist

my chemistry
my interaction

with you

I reach

a point
where I change
my state

from
a solid
to a liquid
to a gas

and then
to some quantum
basis
that
begs
for my
participation
but doesn't
wait for my
permission

I love you
what is that?

what is that?
that that sets
me on my side?
that that takes
me in its wake,
its undertow
and drowns
my sensibilities

every
inch of
my essence
is immersed
I have
no breath
of my own
I can't own
the air

it's all
on loan
from
the universe
for a time

and you too
are like my heart
or any other organ
that I cannot
live without

oh this dysfunction!

I love you
and I don't know
what it means

it means
nothing
without action
without touch
without interaction

so I love
an illusion

a dark
ethereal
body

distant
nondescript
produced
by some
chemical
trick in my head
my brain

electrons again
where are you?
I miss you.
I love you.
do you
really exist?

if so
then...

where are you?

et

extra
terrestrial

magnetic fields
swaying
in the moonlight

beyond
our atmosphere

but exacting
perturbations
that could
only
belong
to
mysteries

my flesh
is torn
and stretched
and
will someday
cease
its breath

then I will
fly
to see
just what
is there
within
that
orbit

that
rest

after all

in the morning
moon
the light
reflected
is abundant

and quite
enough
to illuminate
a reality
I prefer

but day
will come
and the sun
will shine

then I will
see
exactly
what it is
I defy

there
across the
road
your disinterest
waves
in the wind

and the crows
alight
upon
the
rhythm
of the
moving
stems

you
will
never
return

I
am
all
alone

come

my
body
pulses

in accord
with
your
touch

it remembers
the cosmic
life form
that exhaled

and it
returned
as it came
and remained
but had
gone
nowhere
and
everywhere
as a wind

bury your
head
in the
ample
bosom
of a woman
that bends
to your
every breath

bury
yourself
in my thighs
in my chest
grab
my waist
touch my
face
kiss
my
mouth
take
my
sighs

come

full moon

eyes wide
with nothing
inside

longing
for a
touch

even
just a
brush

crush
me
with
love

crush
me
with
that
syrup
that
coats
my throat

that
flavors
everything
with sweet

flavors
that make
me come
into being

bring me
to life

bright
like that
moon
in
the
cold
December
night

craving

aching belly
twists
wrenching
the last
ounce
of resistance

coiling within
uncoiling
and
turning
the rock
over

all the
creatures
run for
cover

all the
creatures
living
there
run

to you

state of being

all but taken up
fringe hangs
from my face

I have dog-eared
marred
stones
dropping
sending
out
waves

my book
is left
open
my pages
torn

I want
you to
read me
retrieve
me

write your
dedication
on my
sheets

wear
the words
in your
ears

and
heart
and
beat
me
beat
me
until
I submit

cataclysm (K-T event)

impact crater
depressed

thrown into
catastrophic
flux

atmospheric
compression

ash
obscures
vision

diaplectic
glass
spatters

burning
maw

drowning

swinging
beast
swipes
at my
beating

opened
gate
kisses
commas

deluge
ensues
tonsils
submerge

week five painting Babcock Park, McFarland

buildings madison more con trails etc.

fire

For beautiful eyes, look for the good in others; for beautiful lips, speak only words of kindness; and for poise, walk with the knowledge that you are never alone."

escape

if i get away
this time
if i get it right
this time

it's only
a matter
of time
before
i get it wrong
all over again

if i get away
this time
if i get it right
this time

it's only
a matter
of time
before
i am wrong
again

centipede

what a miracle
umber
translucence

rippling
along
the floor

rubbery
segments
all work
like a wave

couldn't bare
to touch
wiggly
tentacles

repulsed
fascinated

a beauty
awesome
fearsome
tiny

perfect
specimen
my reflex
to destroy

then
despair
the loss

environs

too mute
to be noticed

to thick
to compute

but the thick
butter of loneliness
is spread
across
your back

it presses
as you sit
in your chair
and stare

into a crazy
moiré
of sacrifice
and delight

hiding
in the
dark
corners

smelling
like
mold
and old
newspaper

sensing
the moist
uncanny
humidity
ocular
rigidity

macular
degeneration

mix
from across
complementary
atmospheres

ether
far
ether
near

simultaneous
broadcast
dot
com
dot
comma
glaucoma
coma
coma
coma

starving
for a burst
of appreciation
from a
tiny
apparition

popping up
in the corner
of the LCD

capitulate
reciprocate
iris
dilate

brightness
blinds
pinching
the brand new

smell
the mildew
in the box upstairs
next to the bed
filled
with mementos
and receipts
and unpaid
bills
scraps
and
fragments
addressed
to the
undersigned

it's like
a byline
autographed
and
inscribed
sincerely

those crinkled
metaphors
and memories
play
a tune
like clanking
clothes
tossing
in the dryer
the heat rising higher

sign off
before it's too late

Sappho

all the songs
sung

each measure
every line

a melody
a phrase

in your name

each stanza
eroded

each fold
corroded

because of
neglect
and fear

oh Sappho
your spell
is not lost

the powerful
fragments
remain

from that dust
from those chips

compose
arias
suspended
in the amber
of our mystery

each fold
a desire

each fragment
a myth

every lost moment
truth

I dance to
the skipping
record of your prose

I jerk
and toss my hair
at every break and tear

drops of
your mortality
lay before
my destiny

oh Sappho
my beauty
my song

the stone

little stone
kicked
rolls
down road

inside
same as
out

unless...
a geode
a fossil
a vein of
precious
mineral

wedge
fissure
with
moist drop

freeze it
crack it

open

like a clam shell
exposing
that most exquisite

manual of style

a structure
with a void
to hold
a certain mass
a volume

something
I can drink
from

something
to find
in the unkind
mind
with its
jagged apostrophes
unjustified parentheses
and most
egregious
ellipses

forever confusing
the feminine and masculine
actively modifying verbs
with no hyphen!

find that angle in the barber chair
where the truth no longer aligns
with magnetic north
it becomes
a moral compass instead
but the red light
in your head
keeps flashing

clashing with the gaudy
chandeliers
that hang
from your
self-importance
your impotence
disguised
by a carnival
of lies

the bitter bombs
the delicate wrists
the pomegranate
fragrances
rub out the musk

mumbled mantras
break your ears

unfolding fears
and jaded
jealousies
in every shade of green

the mall

what creature sprawls
across this cornfield
spoiling its yield?

what menace
lays its tentacles
over our prairie grass?

mirage dance
on asphalt
patches
baking

keep life
from seeping

sticky licorice
bubbles
burning nostrils
cough

dazzling shines
vulcan teeth
sneer

devours
society
inside

they wander
and slip

tossing their
fortunes
across
acres of
beaming
terrazzo

Ami

the ficus
stands
in the living
room
branching
out
across the walls

avocados sprout
profusely
to decorate
the hall

along
the carpet
moss and mold
grow plush
enshroud

in between
her shoulders
thorny disasters
creep

the spikes
tickle
and pierce

simply
day-to-day

confused
pruning
unspeakable
decay

most times
she goes
crawling
to the safety
of the dirt

all but stripped
of her skin
she burrows
deeply in

aloft

I place you up
where angels
faint

dizzy
celestial
fireflies
flicker
and die

this dream
comes

my world
is clothed
a blossoming
chimera

inside
fitful
silence
pricks

but I buy
the ticket
and quietly
take my seat

moth eaten sweaters
half-written letters

the juice is squeezed
from my effigy

it quenches your
mirth

the pattern
is stretched
wretched

more paintings

first snow

scenes around campus again

I'm already here... reprise

I'd like to change some things I've done
go back and make them right
but it's too late
today has come
and I can't make it all right

I try to get on with it all
try to be good
but sometimes I just fail

I know that in the past
I've hurt those I hold dear
I pushed them away
instead of holding them near
what am I to do about it now?
the past is back there
and I'm already here

forgiveness is an exercise in humility
a ride down a lonely road
but it can heal you
you can heal you
when the anger swells

forgive
I forgive you
I'm already here
I'm sorry you're still there

I'm sorry for hurting you
I'm sorry for trying
I'm sorry for shopping
and not buying

I'm sorry sometimes
for my very existence
I'm sorry for loving
I'm sorry for distance

the question is
after all
can we forgive
and not forget
can we relive
and not regret

I forgive you
for hurting me
now forgive me
for hurting you please?

telling lines

i see your words
and they whisper
through the lens
and the iris they
flash on the retina

blending
every color
reflecting
every hue

i see these worlds
with a torch alight
though it bends from
refractions exposed
to my very soul

blending
ever longer
reflecting
ever true

loathe thyself

crutch
of a mask

clutch
the past
like a clown doll

separate
from myself
a

tear

tear

away
the fear
in shrink wrapped
shreds

find
a path
to simplify

simply
to be

the
only
one

who knows

who knows

exactly
how

it
satisfies

and then
deny

it
it
never

hurts
it hurts
to try.

delicious

you coat me in caramel
you sauté me in cream

I am your onion
your magnetic dream

my fingers project
future phantasm scenes
in your palm pudding
and whipped seeds

lick the luscious
caramel coated me
find the apple
inside my tree

I revel on your jaw
chew my soul raw

steam each part of me
bit by bit
take up every flavor
cover your tongue
and savor

sweet and sour
rich and thick

lick, lick...
lick.

winter wind

it stalls over my house
bitter
and unrelenting
a breath
of such
intolerable force
that I
no longer
bend
but break
in its
menacing
miasma

the days
are shorter
assured
but you are there
and you have the switch
in your
hand

you have a blanket
a warm broth
steaming

but you resist
and stand away

as I crumble
in the cold
of
a
winter
day

alchemist

the property
you bestow
upon
my chemistry

beyond the scope
of the
normal every day

I'm written in
your recipe

your elements
compose
my slow
reaction

stirring
in the quake
of absolute
infusion

heated
by a burner
cast
amid
your crucible
and cured in your fire

I am yours
alchemist
I am your stone
I am yours
my philosopher
yours

as on

fog ascends
around
chipping crust

ghostly owl
sounds
burrow through

damp
smell
surrounds

whispers
of waters
slipping

breath
taken

eyelids
close

earth becomes home

half stolen poem

he flips his blade
within
he blends
as he deepens
the furrow
crazy crimes
rage and fade
love is his name

shell

sunrise
sea shore

sand
into
brine

coasting
fishing
wishing

could
this beach
give up
just one
glorious
memento?

one
revelation
from
its
ever
deepening
indigo

first line stolen

pearly everlasting
dealing in delight
this phantom
echoes
eternal
song
within
my mute
heart

party

a girl only gets so many parties
so many streamers
and balloons

so many walks
on a sandy shore

so many kisses
good night
by the door

time takes a turn
these blessings
it can devour

and a woman
only celebrates
what fate
she consecrates

in this age
she can only compel
the imaginary

joy

bubbles
emanate

they tingle
and tickle
as they pass

lightness
as tight
as spheres
that
ascend

burst
in blasts
of laughter

practice, practice, practice!

folded up with regret
but not one to neglect
this tickle
of emotion
known
awfully
as love

this affliction
this addiction
that kills
over
and
over
and
over

because you
never actually die
you just
get beaten
up
beating
up
the heart
that
beats
instead
of retreat
instead
of defeat
you just
come back

for more
and more
and more
and more

soul kitchen

stove
like an onion
layers of grease
the paper
of garlic
collected
beneath

kitchen
bares scent

organic desire

a little bit burnt
on too hot a fire

tiles paint floor
like checker game
every move made
just more same

floor creak
songs break
faucets leak

geometries set
constellations
near chairs

napkins
folded
repeated
white blasts

then a prayer

parting gift

the last time
i saw
the last time
i looked
the last time
i felt

it didn't
make any difference
it didn't
change a thing
nothing to

change
something
so it gets better
than nothing

so it gets less bitter
unless it’s better
less bitter
so it gets better

retreat to art

it's easier
to hold a paint brush
or a pencil

than a hand
or a heart

it's easier
to relate
to light
and shade

than a tear
and a sigh

salt dissolves
paint dries

a canvas torn
still has more
to offer
than eye

ms.

uppity
bitch

slut
cunt
babe

hot
dizzy
whore

hag
nag
old bag

bimbo
shrew
crone

witch
ditz
dumb blonde

shrill
a real
dog

it's all a lie

i said
because it is
and it never was
because i said

so when
does it end?
and why
did it begin?

so then i say
whatever

and then i think
never

my foamy sea

unsecured prospects
land in the sand

bulbous
jellyfish
tissue
tangles
transparent

my foamy sea
washes against
the cast off

debris

crashed
sunken

maybe
even
tossed

but lost

until

tide
drifts out

setting it down
right where
it is found

Con Trails

more on Rita

Updates on St. Rita. Going VERY slowly.

more of the bridge

bridge in morning

Obama Radicals

Passed this sign on the way to work this morning.

Sherlock Holmes

Simon in his little cape and hat I made him for halloween.
He wants to be a detective or Sherlock Holmes.